Majic.iE

My most recent attempt almost succeeded. I did everything right. My three point turn was perfect, my reverse round a corner flawless and my skirt was suitably short and tight. So what you might ask did I slip up on? Seemingly, I don’t check my mirrors enough. Apparently, I failed to properly check my mirrors when changing lanes. Considering the entire test was in single lane traffic; I’m baffled!

But I have consoled myself with the fact that I am not alone. Recent figures suggest that 308,000 Irish drivers are still in possession of a provisional license; that’s one in five motorists. Of these 308,000, those who do decide to apply for their test can expect an approximately eight week wait for a 57% chance of passing. That is correct for €38.00 application fee, roughly two months delay and no doubt numerous costly lessons; the average learner driver can expect to fail just under half the time.

And as if this “hit or miss“ opportunity weren‘t enough; Gaybo and his pals at the RSA have recently decided to make it even more difficult for us to pass by further complicating our attempts to practice for this test. It is a hazard, in Irish society today, to be a provisional license holder. Not just for other road users who come in contact with your questionable driving skills, but to the health of people who must drive on these licences.

Firstly, we are prohibited from driving unaccompanied in our vehicles without the presence of a fully licensed person who has held this license for at least two years. Aside from the fact that not everyone has a fully licensed driver at their disposal 24/7, someone has yet to explain to me the purpose of this person? To fill you in on what happened in last nights Fair City? I think not. This new rule was obviously thought up by someone living in an urban area; namely Dublin. They assume that these previously happy motorists, who were legally able to use their cars to get to and from work can now simply use public transport. This theory does not stand in the countryside where you are more likely to get a lift from a passing tractor than a passing public bus.

Secondly, we are prohibited from driving on an M-standard carriageways, otherwise known as Motorways. This would be digestible were it not for the fact that Minister Noel Dempsey has recently increased the speed limits on 260km of dual carriageway to 120kph, classing them now as motorways and thus, making it illegal for us to travel on these roads, accompanied or otherwise. So the road which last week I used to visit my grandmother has now become unusable to me and I must find alternative routes-thanks Mr Dempsey!

And what if we choose not to obey these rules? The latter will negate your insurance and can include the same penalties as driving unaccompanied. The first carries a €1,000.00 fine if you are caught driving unaccompanied. You can divert attention from yourself by removing your L-plates however, doing so, carries another €1,000.00 on top of it. Also, recent anecdotes from friends and driving instructors reveal that a Garda stopping you with L-plates but without a fully licensed driver are more likely to be lenient than anyone driving without either.

So to drive or not to drive, that is the question? I have reapplied but I face another ten to twelve week wait for a test date so I don’t plan to hang up my L-plates just yet. If only for the practise I’ll need to get it this time. I will continue to keep my L-plates up as I have proof that I am waiting for a test-date. Hopefully that will help my case if I am ever pulled over. I will more than likely spend another €100 or so on lessons and, having accidentally applied and been charged for the test three times online; long story involving my credit card, an onscreen error message and my frustration, spend a further €120.00 on the test itself. Other than that all I can do is stick at it and practice looking in the mirror a lot. And possibly next time, wear a shorter skirt.